Deborah Sugirthakumar: Raising boys who know it’s ok to ask for help

Deborah Sugirthakumar’s Resilient Project opens conversations about parenthood, mental health and safer homes

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When was the last time you asked for help? It’s a question Melbourne’s Deborah Sugirthakumar believes we should ask ourselves.

It’s definitely worth considering this Movember, as conversations turn to men’s mental health and the importance of seeking support.

For this educator, broadcaster and mother, it’s a conversation that begins at home.

“Being a mum of a boy made it personal,” she says. “I began thinking about the kind of man I want my son to grow into: someone who understands his emotions, communicates respectfully, understands boundaries, treats others with kindness, and knows that asking for help is a strength.”

Deborah Sugirthakumar works with families in Melbourne’s Wyndham community to promote mental wellbeing, resilience and respectful relationships.
Deborah works with families in Melbourne’s west to promote mental wellbeing, resilience and respectful relationships. (Source: Instagram)

That reflection helped inspire the Resilient Project, which Deborah founded in June 2025 to encourage conversations about mental health, respectful relationships and emotional safety.

Her message is simple: “Asking for help is not a weakness. It can be one of the bravest and most important steps towards creating a safer and healthier future.”

Deborah resilient project
At an author talk (Source: Supplied)

Through the project, Deborah works with families across Melbourne’s Wyndham community and beyond, offering parenting and youth workshops, digital safety sessions and discussions about preventing domestic and family violence.

A secondary school wellbeing educator, child advocate and author of Raising Resilient Families, she draws on her background in psychology, health promotion and education, alongside her own experiences.

Deborah Sugirthakumar migrated to Australia from Sri Lanka at the age of nine. Looking back, she acknowledges the challenges that shaped her journey, but also the relationships and opportunities that helped her grow.

“There have been difficult chapters,” she reveals. “But there has also been love, purpose, incredible people and opportunities. Everything has taught me something about resilience.”

“For me, evidence and lived experience belong together. But lived experience reminds me that behind every statistic is a real person, a child, a parent, or a family.”

Much of her work focuses on helping children develop the emotional skills they will carry into adulthood: understanding boundaries, communicating respectfully, managing conflict and recognizing when to seek support.

“Prevention must start much earlier, not when someone is already experiencing violence or crisis,” she cautions.

Deborah also recognises the barriers that prevent families from reaching out. Financial pressures, stigma and fear of judgement can make seeking help difficult, particularly when cultural expectations discourage open conversation about family problems.

“Taking help doesn’t mean disrespecting your family,” she says. “We can honour our cultural values while still prioritising emotional and physical safety.”

Deborah was a finalist for Best Newcomer On Air – Small in the 2026 Australian Audio Awards for Mindful Moments (Source: Instagram)

It’s a message she has also carried through more than 16 years in community broadcasting.

Beginning with WYN FM’s Tamil multicultural program Vaaisai, Deborah now hosts Mindful Moments on 88.9 FM, exploring parenting, mental health and resilience.

“Radio has enabled me to reach people where they are,” she says. “It gives people a sense that they are not alone.  There is something personal about hearing another human voice speak openly about sensitive subjects.”

Her community work has earned recognition, including being named a finalist for the 2026 YMCA Victorian Mother of the Year Award. She also served as a judge for the 2026 ABLE Book Awards.

Yet Deborah measures success differently.

“My real winning moments are often very quiet,” she muses.

They are the moments when a young person finds the courage to ask for help, or a parent decides to approach a difficult conversation differently.

As a single mum herself, she knows the importance of having people to lean on.

“We can’t always do everything by ourselves. Sometimes we need family, friends and professionals to help us.”

And perhaps that’s the message Deborah Sugirthakumar most wants her son – and other young boys – to grow up with: strength isn’t about facing everything alone. Sometimes, it’s about knowing when to reach out.

READ ALSO: Breaking the silence: The South Asian mental health crisis

Deborah Sugirthakumar

Vaishali Vijaykumar
Vaishali Vijaykumar
Vaishali Vijaykumar is passionate about exploring diverse forms of storytelling. Besides books, she voraciously consumes podcasts, animated films, and audiobooks on Tamil and Sangam literature. She enjoys meaningful conversations over a cup of strong filter coffee. I'm not on social media platforms, but for LinkedIn @Vaishali Vijaykumar.

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