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Auntyji: I banished him from the bedroom, but then…

They argued, and she banished him to the doghouse. And then for what happened next, she had to turn to Auntyji for help

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Dear Auntyji

I am 35 years old and have been married for 7 years to a really nice man. We get along quite well and rarely have arguments. But something happened recently and I would love your input.

So last month, I had an argument with Vivek. It was about him forgetting to take the garbage out, but I got irritated and had a full-on fight. I got upset, and I said to him to leave me alone and that he should not sleep in the same bed as me.

The next day was Saturday and so I slept in. I saw Vivek around 1pm when I eventually came downstairs; we both apologised to each other and I almost forgot about the whole situation.

But then last week the credit card bill comes in, and it turns out that when we had our argument, Vivek left the house and checked into a hotel. I could not believe it – when I asked him to leave me alone, I expected him to sleep on the sofa – and not to go to a hotel. I am so surprised Auntyji, and I don’t know how to deal with this. What do you think I should do?

Auntyji says

Arre kalmouhi, you kick your husband out of your bed, and you expect him to sleep on the floor like a guilty pup?  In which world do you live that you think you have the right to kick your husband out for a minor infraction like forgetting to take out the garbage? When you let your anger get the better of you, and when you speak with an acid tongue like a nagin, you can expect that only shaitaani harkat will ensue.

Granted Vivek was negligent in taking out the garbage. But it was a minor misdemeanour – and it did not deserve exile from your bedroom. So once aapne mehifil mein ailaan kar diya ki door ho jaa meri nazron se, all bets were off. So Vivek decided that the lumpy and smelly sofa was not good enough for him. And he checked into a hotel. That’s what happens when wives turn into dayans and nag their husbands.

Now if you had said to me that Vivek was a bekaroo who did not lift a finger around the house and he did not care for you and that he preferred the company of his buddies, then my advice to you would have been different. But this is chikna Vivek. He is a caring companion, and did not deserve to be thrown out of the house like that. So you deserve what he did. Why should you be the only one sleeping in a nice warm bed at night. Vivek deserved it too. So both of you made choices that night. And only one of you is living to regret it.

If you want Vivek to move out permanently, then go ahead and have some more arguments with him. I dare you – you kalankini.

READ ALSO: Auntyji: The way he looked at me

 

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