Love thy neighbour, feed thy neighbour?

Dear Auntyji

I live in the beautiful Sydney suburb of Epping and I have a retired Italian couple next door. 

They have a very lush garden. They grow beans, eggplants, potatoes, onions, spinach, peas, cauliflower and all manner of lovely veggies. And they are very generous – each week they send me vegetables across the fence because they know we are vegetarians. This has been going on for months. And they keep saying I’m a wonderful cook because I gave them some samosas many months ago. Now, our neighbour from the other side was talking to me and I mentioned how wonderful the vegetables have been, and she said pointedly that she had heard I was a good cook – and maybe I should send some food to the gardeners every now and again. At first, I laughed this off but then I wondered, was that a subtle hint? What should I do here? 

Auntyji says

Seriously, you kanjoos kalankani. You need me to give you advice about this? Clearly, you’ve lived in this bounteous country for a while, and still haven’t learnt the meaning of generosity. What flavour of a miserly, self-centred haraami are you? So, you have neighbours who have essentially been feeding your family for months – and your shopping bills must have decreased as a result – and it never ever occurred to you to show back a little generosity by sending food across the fence?

Man, I don’t get people like you. The world is so good to you, and you have nothing to give back? All you do is take take take. 

Listen up you kala gulab jamun. I will tell you this only once – and I need you to act on it. Each week, you must make at least one dish – and it must be lovingly prepared, and you must give it to your gardening neighbours. Tell them that for all the vegetables they have been giving you, this is the least you can do. But you must do this – because the world hates takers. If you are being given much, then you must give back much in return. Have you understood this crucial life lesson, you sukda hua karela? This is how society works. And if you can’t be generous, then you need to leave this country and go back to where you came from. 

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