My family is in a bit of a COVID kerfuffle and I am hoping you can help me. Three weeks ago, my husband decided to go to a music concert at a crowded pub in Newtown with 200 other people. He had the best time ever and he sang and danced like a whirling dervish. Then, to no one’s surprise, he got COVID two days later. My son and daughter-in-law are upset with him, because they think he was selfish and negligent. My husband, on the other hand, thinks that it’s just bad luck – and when my son and DIL go to hairdressers or restaurants, they could have just as easily caught COVID. Now there is tension in my house. How do I reconcile my family so that harmony returns?
OMG what a crazy situation. Let’s look at the facts. Yes, it’s true that it’s bad luck that any of us can get COVID. We can get it from anywhere, and some people get it and others just don’t. Where your husband’s logic fails is that unlike a restaurant or a hairdresser, where the environment is controlled to a degree and you have fewer people, a crowded pub in Newtown with 200 people means that statistically, you are almost certain to get COVID. It’s a numbers game. So yes, your husband made a decision that was selfish – if you ran a risk matrix, the likelihood of catching COVID from that event would score as Highly Certain. What do you do with a risk that’s Highly Certain? You avoid it. Everyone knows that – because you can’t transfer it or accept it without significant cost. With that little bit of foresight, your husband knew what was going to happen and he did it anyway. But what’s done is done. How do you get your selfish and foolish husband to make amends? Well, is he being intellectually fraudulent and claiming that it’s bad luck he got COVID the same way it would be bad luck if a bird dropped something on his head as he walked down the street? Or is he saying bad luck but deep down he knows he did the wrong thing? I say as long as patidev is not taking any more chances, then only time is going to heal this breach of trust. Here’s hoping your husband is being remorseful and decides to lie low for a while.
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