Ask Auntyji: wedding invitations and star signs

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Big fat Indian weddings

Dear Auntyji,

We migrated from Fiji to Australia over 20 years ago and so have a large family community here in Sydney. My wife and I live with my parents and everything is going along perfectly. But Auntyji, I have a chota sa sawaal for you. Now, in the Fijian community, there are lots of weddings. But whenever there is an invitation, it comes addressed to my father, and I wonder if the invitation extends to me and my family as well. Shouldn’t I get a separate card? Or does everyone assume that when they invite my dad, there is the implicit understanding that we are the plus five? What are your thoughts? I do get irritated that I don’t get my own invitation, and whether that’s by design? How does one address this?

Auntyji.Indian Link

Auntyji says

Oh my dear boy, what I would do to not be invited to weddings. Every weekend there is some social obligation or the other. Pushpa’s granddaugter is getting married. Vinod’s son is getting engaged. Salma is getting married for the third time. So many weddings. It’s just too much, nah? I suppose for you, I understand you actually want to go to these weddings. In the Indian community, the father is considered the head of the household, so the card will be addressed to him. So you could take that as a given and just rock up to the wedding. Or, if you wanted to make a point about this, call the hosts and ask if you are actually invited as an inclusion in your dad’s invite. You will definitely get an answer. What’s more, you will very quickly be known in your community as a wedding crasher, so people will learn to send you a separate invite, or stop inviting your family entirely. Either way, you will only learn by asking. By the way, what’s with you and wanting to attend weddings? Aren’t they the dullest of events where the women dress up and silently judge each other’s clothes and jewellery while the men look at the dancing girls with googly eyes? I suppose I am old and jaded. I have seen too many weddings in the past six decades. 

The stars foretell

Auntyji.Indian Link

Dear Auntyji, 

My wife does something that irritates me to the nth degree and I wanted your insights so I can get my wife to stop this behaviour. See, my wife is a particularly intelligent woman, with two PhDs in science. She is very smart, witty, charming and a very good wife. But despite being a woman of science, Sneha looks forward to reading her weekly horoscope on sites like Astrostyle.com or Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone. We have had numerous furious debates about this – I tell my wife there is no scientific basis to the horoscopes, but she insists on reading them. How do I get her to stop with this tomfoolery? Everyone knows there is no basis to horoscopes and it is all pure quackery. Can you please help Sneha see the light?

Auntyji.Indian Link

Auntyji says

What are you – a mullah who tells his wife what she can or can’t read? Have you declared a fatwa on horoscopes? You terrible, unsupportive husband – you need to cease and desist your demands immediately. Your wife should be able to read whatever she wants to without your interference. What difference does it make to you if she reads her horoscope? Perhaps she is using the horoscopes as a guide to ascertain what type of ^%#*@ you are. I mean, she has two PhDs – she has earned the right to read whatever she wants. I find it very concerning and highly irritating that you are behaving like a 12th century ganwar who does not want a wife smarter than himself. Have you ever considered reading your own horoscope to find out for yourself what flavour of ^%#*(@  you are? Maybe the horoscopes help your wife cope with you and your irrational demands. I suggest you stop hounding your wife immediately. Otherwise I can tell you right now, without reverting to either Rahu Ketu or Sagittarius’ outlook for the month of May, that you will be heading for divorce shortly. Oh, and beware a friend who does not have your best interests at heart. And avoid yellow on Wednesdays.